mixed feelings

Alhamdulillah, I have received the offer letter to pursue study at UTM via email on Wednesday, 6th July. The registration is on the 6th September and lectures begin on the 12th. But, (because of my own doings) I am not sure if I could secure the scholarship by September. Fingers-crossed, ultimately, InsyaAllah, i pray that Allah will have some mercy on me about this matter...
So, this particular email has made my nervous system works extra hard these past 2 days - a mixed feeling of excitement, enthusiasm, apprehensive, uneasy, blank, sleep-deprivation - only to mention some.
 

Sambung belajar ini adalah satu tanggungjawab besar yang perlu diuruskan dengan baik, apatah lagi dengan menggunakan biasiswa negara, duit rakyat jelata, duit kita semua, so, saya mesti belajar bersungguh2 dan berjaya, dan memberi sumbangan sewajarnya kepada rakyat dan negara.

Friends asked who my supervisor is. I have 2.
'Wah, kak, dia sangat strict! Saya pernah "menangis air mata darah" bila dia jadi examiner saya', Aisyah responded. I gulped. 'Tapi dia sangat jaga kualiti research students di bawah dia', she continued.

'Kak, nanti saya nak pinjam dan baca thesis akak bila dah siap. Selalunya students yang belajar dengan supervisor ni, produced high quality research & paper', Hanim added.

I called the FP office to ask about courses I need to register, and she asked who my supervisor is.

'Wah, puan, beruntung puan dapat supervisors tersebut. 2 - 2 sangat strict tapi mereka sangat bagus. InsyaAllah, puan, ok.' She remarked.

Most friends, especially those who have had experience learning from these two lecturers gave similar comment. They are both strict but at the same time helpful. "Ya Allah... permudahkanlah urusanku dengan bakal supervisors ku ini..."... 


Andai ada yang membaca entri saya ini, doakan saya dalam meneroka satu perjalanan yang baru ini ya... Thanks a lot!